My Manager said, when it comes to managing your own company, trust your instincts above all. Don’t listen to what other Managers are doing with their employees, or how they run their companies, because well, they’re not you. They don’t have your same management style, nor do they have your employees. It is so true, such sage advice. And yet so much easier said than done.

Can someone tell me why is it that in our corporate society, it seems like the overriding motivation for all management practices seems to be keeping one’s employees out of therapy? I received a Management Practices Newsletter in my inbox today, and granted, I did sign up for it, but it’s tailored specifically toward my individual employee’s growth, and I have found it helpful, or at least interesting, in the past. Maybe it was just my mood today, but this particular newsletter annoyed the hell out of me. It basically pointed out several things that I seem to be doing wrong in managing my company.

One, I allow my employees to work with the background TV noise. Apparently background TV noise is the devil, and will inevitably result in ADD for your employee. Not to mention a childhood deprived of quality playtime. And lowered intelligence. Silly me, thinking it provides some much-needed downtime for my overactive employee.

Also, Management should never, ever refer to medicine as “candy,” in any way, shape or form. Because clearly this if you get the idea that medicine is CANDY, which=GOOD, which=NO MORE HURT, then they will turn to pills and other addictions later in life. And have an inadequate, unhappy adulthood, rife with problems, which will inevitably lead to one or more stints in rehab, and yes, THERAPY. And it will be all their Manager’s fault. Obviously.

And, by the way, candy—I mean, medicine—should be stored in a lockbox. Or a locked cabinet. Or a lockbox. A LOCKBOX. Guess what? At our company, we do have a supply closet containing medicines that is locked. But we also have some out on the counter, in plain sight. All with childproof caps. And all are OFF LIMITS to my employees, who know this rule quite well. My real, actual candy is in a cabinet with childproof latches. Because guess which one I think my employees are MUCH more likely to go after, if they were motivated to break the rules.

There was more, in the newsletter, but at this point I’m enjoying my wine too much to care. I’m just tired, so tired, of this prevailing sense of fear, doubt, and judgment that is fostered by the media in newsletters such as these, and then passed on to the masses, who then give you the stink-eye when you do something in your company that in their companies wouldn’t fly—because some media source told them it shouldn’t fly.

When, as Managers, we should all be proud of what we do, and supportive of the choices that we each make for our companies. Because whether or not those employees of ours do end up in therapy someday? Chances are we Managers, who care more than anything about our employees, are doing the very best we can, in the best way that we know how.

Keep in mind that it was a really long day at the office.