Our Kitchen Staff would like to note the following for our records:

-All employees should be advised that the Kitchen Staff holds rights to all menu decisions, for both meals and snacks. When visiting the cafeteria, employees may be given an either/or choice, or they may not. It is all up to the Kitchen Staff. Meal and snacktimes are not a free-for-all where employees who have been with the company a mere two years decide what is best for them, in terms of content or quantity.

-To the Canine Staff: Although we appreciate your cleanup services and agree that they are far superior to any vacuum around, sometimes you go too far. And you know when you go too far, yet you do it anyway. Once again, you are advised to maintain a reasonable distance from all human company members during mealtime, "reasonable" being defined as not hovering. Surreptitious snatching of food from an employee hand that just "happens" to float near your nose is also unacceptable. Your cleanup services are not required or welcome until you are given the official OKAY from The Managerial Staff only. Flagrant violation of these rules will result in immediate banishment to our outdoor offices, where you can watch the humans eat through the window.

-The Managerial Staff should also be advised of the following trick: Employees seem more apt to try new things when it is on anyone's plate but their own. Likelihood for success increases when that food seems coveted; so remember, broccoli, peas, and carrots are way too tasty not to mention out loud.